The park behind my first home

The bubble gum
eyeballs
of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
ice cream
from the ice cream
man

Was all anyone could ever dream of

I stared at the sticker
of an approximate copy
of the real thing
Like it was
a treasure map

"That one"

I said, staring up at the ice cream man

While the other kids around me shouted their orders
as well
He reached back
but stopped

"Oh he's not with us"

said the mother of the children I met at the park
She said it like
I was
trying to steal
but I was only confused

I was still very young
maybe 4 years old

we had played
with no problem
we would not eat ice cream
together

My skin flushed
I felt
embarrassed
apart
dejected

I felt,
different than all the other children

I ran
there was nothing else I could think to do
than get as far away from
it as possible

My mother sat under a tree on a blanket
tears ran down my cheek
The sun was lower in the sky
it must have been past
midday

That moment plays in my mind
every so often
ever since then

It was the smallest I felt when I was small
and sometimes
When I think I am apart of something
with somebody
and I realize they never saw me the same way

I am that little boy
again.