If it wasn’t California it might have snowed…
Mid December, just days before the pinnacle of an ever growing season.
The lobby of the local mall was decorated to the very tip of every fake plant and guard rail with reds and greens and sticky faux snow. The bustling crowds swirled around us like a pool on the bank of a river.
I can’t help looking around at the different people, if it weren’t for that fake tree in the center plaza I’d have a perfect birds eye view to this holiday mess.
“Excuse me sir, did you say you wanted blue cheese dressing on your salad?” said my waiter.
He was a short clean cut fellow. I would have placed him at 17 or so, a lot younger than I thought would work at a place like this. Old enough to grow some facial hair though, as he proudly displayed his 5 o’clock shadow that no doubt took weeks to trim just right.
“Yes,” I said while nodding, as if either affirmation wouldn’t have been enough on its own.
He smiled and walked off to another table. My guess would be future store manager, or assistant manager. He had all the makings of a guy with low level management suck up skills. I bet when he is off work, he wears a blue tooth headset connected to a Blackberry on his belt.
“You need to stop judging people, Evan” said the girl sitting directly across from me.
Her name was Eleanor. She was cute, short, dark-skinned, and, at the moment, a little annoyed with me. We used to date, we might even still be going out, I don’t know. I don’t really know why I’m here.
“How could you tell?” I asked, half admitting she was right.
“You have a look about you when you stare at certain people,” she said, softening up a bit. “It’s normally followed by some joke about them, but ...”
My mind wandered, she spoke but I didn’t listen. The candle on the table was lit, but the restaurant was still too bright. The little flame couldn’t beat back the white glow of a cloudy afternoon.
“What’s wrong Evan?” she finally asked.
Her face was genuinely perplexed, but also worried, like she already knew the answer but hoped to God she might be wrong.
I could hear O Holy Night being played by a quintet of horns. I think I read somewhere that when the Titanic sunk, the band continued to play. My ship was about to capsize.
And there it was.
Eleanor represented so much for me. She was, for all intents and purposes, the first and only girlfriend I have ever had. She was Genesis, day one, my Eve. The culmination of so many things I had longed for. How many Christmas’s were filled with a happy fulfillment of my desires yet, for the first time, I got exactly what I wanted and was handing it back.
I can remember the first time I asked her out in a round about way that could only be described as mine. I was afraid she might say no, but in the back of my head I knew better. I had her; from before day one I had her in the palm of my hand. I knew she would say yes. There was no real risk. It was written in her eyes. But I guess it wasn’t in mine.
“Evan stop daydreaming and tell me what’s wrong,” she demanded. “I think I deserve that much.”
She was right. I could hear her now. Clear as day, my mind came into focus. I am here to break up with Eleanor.
Its funny, break-up’s happen on regular basis yet there is still no right way to end something as substantial as a romance.
I guess it isn’t really that funny. Now that I think about it, I’ve never done this before. Another first for Eleanor. I wasn’t nervous though, for once in our relationship I was confident.
“I just think we should…”
As the words finally hit Eleanor’s ears, her demeanor changed. She wasn’t sad, in fact, she seemed prepared. I mean, I think she might have been sad, but she wasn’t surprised.
Instead of crying or fighting she just nodded. It was more like that sweet release, pulling the plug on a patient that had been on life support too long.
The vent above released warm air into the chilling atmosphere. On our table, the candle between us flickered and finally gave into the breeze. All we were left with was a softly weaving thread of smoke and the check.
Posts
